Notes I jotted down in 2022
January 2022: “A pain shared is a pain spread.”
February: “Some people prefer me to be kind, not honest. This person would rather me be honest than kind. Note to myself: Learn which one is which.”
March: “Trying to be hateful and worthy of contempt is an old strategy. It is not going to work anymore.”
April: (quote) “Parents want their babies to be safe, not great".”
April, again: “Nothing could ever make me miss you more than how I missed you when we were still together.”
May: (quote) “In a way, lying is a kind of empathy. You protect people from the burdens you don't want them to bear. But... if you keep people in the dark, you take away their power. If you lie, you have to know that you're right.”
June: “The worst thing is to be "nothing"ed.”
July: “Selflessness makes for efficiency but it is not beautiful or the truth. Don't be a martyr, be a model.”
August: “You are not alone. You are without her. There is a difference.”
September: “I used to shift my tone for every person - every person saw me in a different light. Now, I’m starting to speak to every person in the same way, give or take the depth of the conversation. By talking to people without microanalysing how I think they want me to turn up, I am making boundaries.”
October: “We carry our ancestors in our genes - that is known. So, what if, when we think and feel there is a thing such as reincarnation or reliving a past life, we are actually exploring our conceptual memories as shaped by our ancestors - through our blood, our senses, our knowledge of place as passed down over thousands of years?”
November: “I keep photo albums, create books out of words from loved ones, I make digital scrapbooks, video compilations, collecting my dreams into journals. For a while, I thought I was an avid organiser. Today, it hit me - in all my organisation, am I looking to tell stories? Am I working hard to capture the roughness of my life and turn it to the light, and create art?”
December: “Focus on what you want to do with your time most. Be selective what other people ask of you and disguise as favours for you.”
Final lesson: “Be honest, and it will be enough. I promise. Even if it’s not enough for them.”